Hate my innovative eyeglasses….

“You kidding me – only THREE words?”

That’s the title and six words story for speed readers and busy writers. Let your imagination carry you away. See 2008 reviews on 5 women’s fiction novels.

Expounding…..eye strain and reading glasses.

UPDATED – The eyeglasses were returned and remade, not once but three times.  The final return now awaits a refund.  But my eyes stopped hurting and turning red.  Even a second prescription reading did not show that I needed any changes though.

But — this is all about the progressive eyeglasses.

Customer opinionated rant ahead.

Ever noticed a person reading and their head is loose? They wobble on their chair like reacting to quick-shooting sensations?

I thought it was a muscular disease. I have been there and back.  I empathized. But perhaps I am at the bottom of it. Stay with me now.progressive multifocal lenses vision

Three weeks ago I ordered new bifocals. They told me about a new-fangled reading glasses combo. Progressive mutli-focals. These have a bifocal definition on the bottom of the lens for the arm-length distance computer screen or store shelf. The half-lens above is for driving, watching birds, seeing individual snowflakes in the garden.

I loved both those focals, loved them.

Then it was time to read.

This is where the reading corridor is used, the tiny hourglass shape in the center of the entire lens.

large print books reading eyestrainI am an author. I read all day. Books. Computer screen a foot from my face with bifocals on to see clearly. Much eyestrain. A real neck cramp, but I do it. That is why I was excited about the new-fangled reading hourglass in the center of my new multifocal glasses. Just in time for the twenty book reading spree research before my next novel on Lindsay, Gooee, and Heather Laurel’s story behind Jesus and the Essenes. omgoodness! I was so happy.

Open book to read. There is no focus. All blurred.

What did they tell me? You gotta point your nose at what you want to see.

Hmmm…..

Fifteen minutes of pointing my nose like a Brittany spaniel and I figure it out.

I am able to see three words in large text. Five words in small text. All I can read at a time in new-fangled lenses. The rest is distorted, not just blurred. Distorted. Page is like a wave of paper if I don’t move my head. I say to me, these are good for reading with Amazon Kindle books or my ebooks for Blackberry. Not book books.amazon-kindle-books-spirituality

I call optometrist’s office. They again mention this might take a few weeks to adjust. I don’t have a few weeks. I am cramming. Well, come back tomorrow and maybe the lenses can be tilted.

I try all day to do it right anyway. Had been so excited, you know. Headaches, neck ache, nausea would fade with new glasses. Now I am tense. Neck pain. Now I walk like Johnny Dep on Pirates of the Caribbean. Feel drunk too. And carsick.

Tomorrow comes. Office manager explains that she is on her fifth pair of new-fangled before finding an improved, less distorted patent that works for her. She put me in THE ONE that works for her to spare me.

Me: I am not spared. Show me again what it is like to read in these things.

And she reads down the page of a book, head shaking all the way.

hate-my-new-eyeglassesMe: So you are not kidding. I will only be able to read three words on one line at a time with these. I cannot rotate my eyes alone to read the line above or line below. I have to move my head up and down. And I have to move my head left and right to see the left of the line and the right. Reading a wide-page will be rocking fun. Whee, large print novels, fun!

She: Yes, that’s the way they are. Like we told you, they take getting used to. You have to point your nose at what you want to read.

Me: Point your nose at it! What that means to me is point your nose at the BOOK! Point your nose at the cereal box. Point your nose at the up-close computer monitor. Not the three words you want to read.

She: Point your nose at the words.

Me: I just want to be certain we aren’t missing something here. I will never be able to read more than three to five words on one line again without shaking my head side-to-side as I propel my head up and down over the page for as long as I shall live? Right?

She: Ninety-eight percent of our patients order the progressive lenses. They adjust and like them.

Me: That’s bull. No one likes this.

She: There are several manufacturers. These have been around twenty-five years. They are much improved.

Me: I cannot imagine. Some things are better off left unimproved and this was obviously one.

I further assured the office they needed to be more specific with their patients about what their noses needed to point at. Three words means three words. That no one wanted to live like this and I would not. That the 30-day return policy with no refund on the new-fangled lenses was not acceptable. That I wanted bifocals, so re-measure me anyway. Right, you read it right. My insurance company paid $145, I paid $105 for the new-fangled progressive-type multi-focals at a discount. But I sent them back for regular bifocals and will not be refunded. They are doing me a favor for giving me the thirty-day option to adjust and return. Their deception on an inadequate product, I pay. They? The techs, office manager, optometrist, lens manufacturers, and patent holders get paid. Do you want to guess where these patents were developed? I’m not saying it.

I am reading with bifocalsNow I ask you, the readers, oh, and the writers of books — we who have our head in words all the live long day. What do you suppose we will look like when we are ten or twenty years into this new-fangled phase of living in our new-fangled reading lenses? Our heads shaking loose on our necks whether we are reading or not. Our entire bodies with this swivel-bob motion. Going…. Uummmmm…… where is that word again? What line was I on? Like… like… well like wobbly elderly people who sometimes lose their stability and have earned that wobble. Only we will be thirty and fifty years old and wonder why.

Now the newer version – the multizone bifocal – is supposed to be superior, studies say.

Read the rest of this entry »

Advertisements

Five women’s fiction books on the Women’s Fiction Blog – five authors that I recommend for 2009 reads.  One theme is reincarnation in most, spiritual awakening and /or life awakening in all.  If you read these, please go to Amazon and review, they all deserve attention in an awakening world.

Enjoy – Essa

________

The Painter’s Gift the-painters-gift-holt-reincarnation-essenes

Author Penelope Holt

Reviews–

The Painter’s Gift… the place of religion in life is more practically divined here. The idea of piecing together a new holy message is appealing, the lead character is worth pulling for. –Clarion-ForeWord

Frankly, I can’t believe that this is Penelope Holt’s first novel! It is truly an excellent, fascinating, and meaningful piece of work. The Painter’s Gift… conveys a powerful message that ‘sticks’ with the reader long after the adventure of reading it is completed. It is a ‘gift’ for all just waiting to be unwrapped!    –Dr. Alex Pattakos, author, Prisoner of Our Thoughts

…Dan Brown’s obsession with (religious) detail doesn’t show up… Essentially, the story revolves around simpler themes of remorse and joy; loss and renewal; and embitterment and faith. Holt presents an interesting concoction of romance and quasi-religious mystery that blends quite seamlessly. She has crafted a pleasantly surprising novel and a solid, quick read. –Five Stars, Bookreview.com

___________________________

Threadsthreads-gavin-reincarnation-book

Author Nell Gavin

Reviews–

Nell Gavin has brought Anne Boleyn, the second wife of Henry VIII, to vibrant life in her unusual historical novel, Threads. Anne’s path from that of an unloved and abused young girl, to the position of Queen of England, is presented by Anne herself as she looks back upon the circumstances that eventually led to her execution. Although there really isn’t a lot of actual historical information about Anne, Gavin has created believable personalities with strengths and weaknesses, imperfections and understandable desires. Using a combination of fact and legend, she tells a story of passion, obsession, and heartbreak that will capture readers with its depth and humanity.

….in the end, beautifully coaxes the dark ghosts of a long dead past into the present for an introduction readers won’t soon forget.  Threads is a remarkable effort. It is, without a doubt, one of the best historical novels I’ve ever read. I give it my very highest recommendation!

–Nancy Mehl, author, book reviewer,  Amazon review

___________________________

A Breath Floats Bya-breath-floats-by-metaphysical-reincarnation

Author Thayne Hudson

Reviews–

An astonishing and beautifully crafted book of the strong currents beneath the thin veneer of modern life.  You may never again view a coincidence in the same light.

A Breath Floats By is about infidelity, divorce, women’s friendship, commitment, cancer, death and the afterlife. The story originates from the philosophy of astrology and numerology, dream interpretation and psychic gifts, the Essenes mysticism and reincarnation, soul mates and life’s sacred contracts. Beneath a timely, gutsy eternal love story, a swirling spiritually-charged world is exposed.

–Heather Fairbairn, Edmonton, Canada

What is important, and fascinating (in A Breath Floats By) is their relationships with one another, including their souls. How one character meets another, and comes to feel that they have known the other before; or one person can love another for years, and yet not feel consummated, in all the senses of the word. How soul and memory play a supremely important part in the loves of real people, if they will only pay attention.

When measured by that yardstick, I am sorry to say that many novels, even best sellers, often seem shallow by comparison.

–Bill Fabrey, NAAFA Founder

___________________________

Seeking Sara Summersseeking-sara-summers-gabriel-womens-fiction-books

Author Susan Gabriel

Reviews–

The story of Sara (Summers) Stanton sounds like that of many women who live their lives trapped into a life of mostly self-imposed expectations…. the reader is inside Sara’s head all through the story… made the struggle very personal, and somewhat painful. I had this urge to step into the book and scream to Sara it was all right to follow her heart.

Sara’s cancer read to me like an allegory…  it didn’t feel so much like a physical malady but more like a symbol that the way we live our life can just as easily kill us within. Sara’s worst enemy doesn’t seem to be her physical cancer, but the mental one…. I kept focused on that bright light at the end of the tunnel that Sara was navigating, and that I kept hoping she’d reach before perishing of self imposed darkness.

–Amazon reviewer Elena

___________________________

Featherfeather-ebner-reincarnation-fantasy-womens-fiction

Author Abra Ebner

Reviews–

Note from Essa Adams — I am including this book because it tickles my fancy – listen to this description, followed by a simple review. Do you feel the comedy coming on…

“…..the book is based on a legend where in the beginning the gods made man and woman, one being, one person. This being was so perfect, the gods grew jealous, ripping the being apart and casting them to earth in their greed… this created man and woman, sharing one singular soul. The woman was the watcher of their soul and the mother of earth – the male was the warrior and strength. But the male also hungered for the soul the female possessed, so their existence together was bitter-sweet, and dangerous….. The story is set in modern times, at a secluded college … where… she finds her other half and her true love. She discovers her life until now was only a fraction of the life she had lived. Immortal, she finds that her past life was lost, torn from her in a moment where she had no choice. Edgar, her other half, struggles to stifle his desire to kill her, choosing love instead, and a life of eternal turmoil.

…complicated… magical world where we learn to appreciate our human ease for love and acceptance. As Elle faces her demons, her friends, and her enemies in a world she never thought possible, where warriors spring from the earth and angels can exist amongst us, she finds a power and happiness she had thought gone forever.” end description

Review …funny, yet endearing, also packed with action, and nothing was sugar-coated, and I like that.  The magical element was seamless and well-backed, nothing seemed too far-fetched, and as the mysteries unraveled I had a lot of fun figuring it out along with the characters. She didn’t give anything away too soon, and the twists were unexpectedly perfect, and eye opening. The story unraveled seamlessly, keeping me intrigued.

–Amazon reviewer Lucy